Life

Friday, June 15, 2007
Current mood: melancholy Category: Dreams and the Supernatural
So, I think on Monday I will have been here for 4 weeks. 4 weeks already. I have my clothes unpacked and put in a closet, I have a loft to sleep on, I am paying a very small rent, I have a job... and I went grocery shopping the other day. I realized that I hadn't *really* been all out grocery shopping in the US in over 4 years. Isn't that crazy? Prices are higher than I remember them being; for the record.
So. Here I am. It's hot here. Not hot like home, not muggy; so not even like Micronesia. But hot like Egypt. Ha. I twice now find myself in the desert in summer. I hear things at night here. Two of the guys get up before dawn to go ballooning and sometimes I am just coming home from waiting tables and then hanging out with people from work. Just as the dawn is coming there is .... how to describe it? Chanting? Yelling? Yowling? Yeah, yowling in a native language so far off in the distance. The first time I heard it was around the full moon and I and the others who live here thought it was a full moon ceremony. No one else here has heard it, but I have told them about it. The second time I heard it I knew without a doubt that it is not a full moon ceremony but a daybreak ceremony. It is a celebration of the coming day. I have also heard, in the even further distance, what sounds like an answer to these yowls (I sound my barbaric yowl; for those of you who know I love "Dead Poets Society). I hear them and I can't help but think of that woman long ago in Korea who sat at the man-made lake and yelled at it long and hard multiple times. She also yowled. And I hear it and can't help but think that whoever makes these sounds lives near people. Like, they live near me. And I love that. I hope to one night go in search of the source. I think I even hope to one night make my own barbaric yowl from my own doorstoop. In any case, it is a very surreal sound to drift off to sleep too.
I have also dreamt of tornados 3 times in the past few months, I believe I blogged about one of those dreams, but it has become a curious recurring dream for me. Anyone out there with dream analysis expertise... let me know what this means.
And finally, an update as is my blog style. I change my mind so often that I like to keep my readers up to speed on what I am thinking. I am not thinking much actually. Which is weird. I do feel days of restlessness. And I did apply for what my housemates call a "real" job, which is described as a behavior tech in a home which houses teens for 3 month spurts and kind of tries to straighten them out. Teens who have been through rehab or with minor mental issues, like depression. They tell me they don't take kids with psychotic disorders or kids who have sexual abuse pasts either. This includes sexaul abuse as perps or victims. Ha, I wonder who is left. Such a cynic. Anyway, the home isn't open yet but I am, as told by my interviewer, the most qualified; read over-qualified and under-paid for my qualifications :) It is a bit scary because it is a job that would at least lock me in for 3 month periods of time. Man, what a wimp I have become that I don't even want 3 month commitments anymore, eh? I am still thinking about Korea in my future again. But I have kind of started to think of home again too, as in the US. Not forever, but I have started to look at jobs here and wonder if I could save money like I did in Korea and if I could justify working short term like I did there. In other words, can I save as much as I did there working as a waitress here? Maybe. If so, why not? Save the money here and go travel like I want to do. Come back and do it again? Or go to Korea, whatever is right at the time. Korea feels like it is still in my future; just maybe not so near as I was thinking.

Currently listening : Dilate By Ani DiFranco Release date: By 21 May, 1996
1:38 AM